A New Baby Is Coming: My Sibling Bonding Checklist (Part 1)

A 3-minute read. Go on, treat yourself!

A new baby is on the way. How exciting!

And for your older child, it's a huge change too. Here's my checklist to help build a strong connection between your children, and ease the transition for your whole family.

Before Baby Arrives 🤰

1. The Magic 20. Build 20 minutes of dedicated, one-to-one time with your older child into every day. It strengthens your bond and reassures them of your love through all the changes ahead.
2. Manage expectations. Children may have mixed feelings about a new sibling. That's normal. Give them time and space to adjust.
3. Step into their shoes. Imagine how it might feel to have a new person arrive in your family. Name and validate those feelings.
4. Practise with a doll. Let your older child practise nappy changes and cuddles on a doll. Give specific praise for their gentle care.
5. Bring them to a scan. Talk about the baby as a real little person. "Why do you think the baby is sleeping?"
6. Imagine together. What will the baby wear? What will they play with? What will they love most?
7. Stories and memories. Read books about babies, and look at photos of when your child was a baby. Treasure those memories together.
8. Meet a newborn. If you can, arrange a playdate with friends who have a new baby, so your child can see what babies need.
9. Prepare your visitors. Talk to grandparents and friends about how they'll greet the older child first. Maybe they could bring a little gift for them too.

When Baby Comes Home 🏡

10. Open arms first thing. Start each day by walking into your child's room without the baby in your arms. The first thing they see is your arms open wide, just for them.
11. A gift from the baby. Make the first meeting memorable with a thoughtful present "from" the new baby.
12. Calm first visits. Keep the atmosphere low-key, and let your child greet you without the baby in your arms.
13. A feeding basket. Set up a basket of sticker books and lap activities near where you feed the baby, so your older child has something to do beside you.
14. The Magic Tat Box. Collect small, inexpensive bits and bobs your child hasn't seen before, and bring one out at feeding time. Magic!
15. Little morning surprises. In the early days, leave a small surprise for your older child to wake up to, like colouring or playdough. It helps them feel special during a busy time.

Play Mummy and Baby 🧸

Toddlers love to play baby themselves. Wrap them in a blanket and play Mummy and baby games. It meets their need for closeness, and helps them understand what a mum does when she has a new baby.

And be kind to yourself. Give yourself time to settle in with your new baby.

Coming next, Part 2: introducing your older child to their new sibling, and helping them adjust.

💛 Expecting and wondering how your little one will cope? Book a Free Discovery Call and let's talk it through together: https://www.thepottyqueen.me/free-call

With love, Principal Lisa x